Holding Pattern
2024–2025
Ink on Paper
Framed: 20 x 20 in (50.8 × 50.8 cm)
Holding Pattern is a series of eight small-format ink drawings created before, during, and after the death of my father, Louis Colon Pomales Jr. The drawings developed in the moments and spaces available throughout his care, providing a way to process and reflect as circumstances continued to change. Through line, repetition, and rhythm, the series records an experience of suspended time.
Across the series, line functions as both gesture and measure. It circles, accumulates, separates, and changes direction as the circumstances surrounding the work change. What began as a way of making within uncertainty gradually became a visual record of the space between presence and absence.
The series concludes with Ghosts in the Afterlife, created in the silence following my father's aquamation.
All eight original drawings were ultimately mounted and framed together, transforming the individual works into a single composite presentation. The completed Holding Pattern collection was donated to the headquarters of Signature Hospice in recognition of its connection to my father's care and passing, where it remains permanently installed.
Finding My Way - The first drawing in the series. It was created while I was trying to locate a rhythm that didn’t hurt. Each diagonal mark was a quiet attempt at order, a personal metronome in the disorientation of early grief.
Staying Calm - Drawn in the thick of caregiving, when I was trying to be steady for everyone else. The layered blue lines are a held breath, me trying to show grace while unraveling inside.
A Walk in the Woods - This was the height of our unspoken understanding. I felt like we were walking side by side—imperfect, but in rhythm. The layered paths reflect a rare moment of balance before everything broke open.
Tense? - The moment I saw the slope beneath me—when calm started to tighten into something sharper. I was still holding it together, but the pressure had started. This is the beginning of knowing what’s coming and not being able to stop it.
Ascension - This is the rise. The moment I felt him begin to leave, grief and grace braided together. Every line is a quiet recognition of his elevation, and my role in letting go.
Making Sense of It All - The hours right after—full of noise, forms, faces, and decisions. My body was moving faster than my heart could keep up. This drawing holds that rush of complexity, when everything had changed but nothing had stopped.
Navigating the Elements - In the days that followed, I was part administrator, part mourner. Each task required precision, and each moment demanded presence. This piece maps the tangle of grief and duty—what it means to keep moving while holding the weight.
Ghosts in the Afterlife - The final piece in the series. A soft farewell wrapped in pale blue. He is gone—and I remain—but not alone. This drawing holds the quiet grace of acceptance and the echoes I now carry forward.